It’s just a bad manicure. But also not.

I have a pattern of not speaking up when something starts to hurt

I got a bad manicure this week. Not just a bad application or an uneven trim. The kind where your nails hurt after, and the damage sticks around for a while. The tech didn’t have the right tools to remove gel, and instead of speaking up (aside from when it really started hurting), I just let it happen. I left with a layer of gel still on my nails and a very messy French manicure.

I paid. I left. I was annoyed. And honestly, I was embarrassed too, but mostly because my hands look awful.

But I keep thinking about how familiar that feeling is—knowing something isn’t right, wanting it to stop, and staying quiet anyway.

It’s a lot like burnout. You can say it’s the result of your environment, your workload, your team. And sure, that’s true. But at some point, have to realize you had a role in it, too. Even if that role was just staying quiet when you could’ve said, “This isn’t working.”

It’s not about blame.

Just acknowledgment.

That’s where I’m at today. Drinking a glass of wine while thinking about what I’ve done.

P.S. You’ll notice I’m sending these at random times during the day on random days of the week. I was serious about this being a brain dump. A very public journal. Thanks for being here. :)